Saturday, December 14, 2013

Stop Being So Damn Judgmental

I try to feed my kids a wholesome, healthy diet, with fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, carbs etc. Does that mean they never eat candy? Or drink the occasional soda? Of course not. They eat cake at birthday parties and doughnuts for breakfast sometimes. And I have been known to make foods that come from a box and are artificially colored neon orange - OH THE HORROR!!!!

You know what, my kids are healthy. Knock on wood (searches for wood but settles for own head) they don't have any major health problems and compared to a lot of other kids, rarely get sick. That's because I believe in the old saying "everything in moderation".

Would they be so healthy if everything they ate was from a box, or can or fast food joint? Probably not. I'm lucky that my kids like vegetables. Especially green ones. Broccoli, brussell sprouts, asparagus. But they also like mac 'n cheese, fried chicken and cookies. Hell, so do I. We just don't eat it all the time.

At the 9-moth-old's baby class - where we sit around singing songs and bragging about the latest milestone our child(ren) has reached - there was a little on who was celebrating their birthday. The parent brought in cupcakes and juice for everyone. Nice of them, right?

The juice was freshly squeezed orange juice and freshly juiced organic carrots, apples and pears. Amazeballs! The cupcakes were gluten free-something-something and instead of icing, they had mascarpone cheese, some of which were flavored/colored with butternut squash and blueberries. Personally, I thought that was a little weird, but hey, to each their own. I was impressed with all the trouble this mother had gone through and commended her for trying to be as healthy as possible.

My 9 month old was almost exclusively breastfed until she was 8 months old. She didn't take too kindly to the pureed foods, so I started giving her small soft chunks or pretty much whatever we were eating at any given time. She is on table foods and formula now. (You can string me up and lynch me for poisoning her later.)

She has not been known to turn down much in the way of food. She loves green veggies, chicken, salmon, eggs, bread, pasta, fruit etc. Well, she was not diggin' those cupcakes. After I tasted the "ficing" (or faux-icing) I knew why. They were horrible! So tart! Not sweet at all.

So a few of us moms were standing around and one mentioned that she had bought her daughter's cake from Publix and made a little smash cake herself. Well, if you could have seen the other moether's reaction, you would have thought she had said she heats up the spoon while the kid ties the rubber tube around her arm. She sort of half whispered, half yelled "you gave her SUGAR?!?!?!?!" with the most disgusted look on her face.

My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe it. Who does this woman think she is to react that way and criticize a fellow mother on what she chooses to feed her child in the way of birthday cake? It's a piece of cake for jeebus sake. Half of it ends up on the floor, up their nose and in their ears anyway. All of a sudden the other mother is back peddling, feeling like she has to explain herself to the health-obsessed psycho.

All respect I had for this woman for the organic, fresh-squeezed juices and rancid tasting cupcakes flew right out the window.

One of the other moms leaned in and whispered to me "I'm planning on getting my son's cake from Publix, does that make me a terrible mother?" I replied with "Absolutely not! I bought both my other children's cakes from Publix and they're still alive!"

I cannot stand how judgmental women can be, let a lone mothers. Listen people, most of us are trying to do the best we can with what we have. What is so wrong with giving a kid a little sugar on their birthday? What happens when these kids are old enough to start going to other kids parties. Are you not going to allow them to eat the cake, or take home the candy that come out of the piƱata?

In my experience, the kids that are constantly denied treats, like cake or ice-cream or the occasional candy or chocolate, are the ones who go batshit crazy over it when they do have the opportunity.

It's like the kids who go off to college after being made to come home by 11 all through high-school and who are never allowed a sip of beer or champagne on a special occasion. (And no, I am not condoning underage drinking. I grew up in Europe where it is the "norm" and personally don't feel the occasional glass of watered down wine on Christmas is that big of a deal.) They go off to college and fly off the deep end, drinking themselves into stupors and staying out until all hours every night, with god knows who, just because they can.

My advice...chill out. Let your kid have a little sugar every once in a while. And for the love of all things good in this world, do not judge another mother because of what she chooses to feed her child. And don't make her feel like shit in front of a bunch of other people because of it.

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